Childlike Connectedness

22 11 2011

Tuesday Re-mix -

At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?” He called a little child and had him stand among them. And he said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 18:1-3

Have you ever noticed that, when it comes to choosing playmates, children don’t seem to be bothered by any of the same concerns which we hold? When we find out that our child has taken more than a passing interest in another child, we have a thousand questions about that child…and we are frustrated when our child doesn’t know the answers to ANY of them. Where does she go to church? What does he believe? Who are his parents? What does her daddy do for a living? Where does he live? WHAT IS HIS/HER LAST NAME? And when we ask, we get nothing from our own child about any of these concerns. Because children just don’t care about these things when choosing a playmate.

Of course, the longer they live in the world, the more and more the world teaches them about what “really matters” when it comes to judging people. Unless they are intentional about staying childlike, they begin to lose this ability to connect with anyone and everyone irrespective of outward appearance or social status or even belief systems. This makes me sad. And I believe it makes Jesus sad too.

This post comes on the heels of last week’s post about generational differences in the church today, specifically, how Gen X’ers and Millennials tend to BELONG first, and BELIEVE second and what that teaches us about how we connect with people in the church. Today, I am pinning that concept to a teaching from Jesus, because I firmly believe that the generational changes washing across the church’s landscape today DID NOT catch Jesus by surprise.

Jesus insisted that having a certain “childlikeness” is more than just helpful to a Christian…it is critical. And the more I meditate on His words in Matthew 18:2-3, the bigger and broader that concept becomes to me. I have long understood “childlikeness” to include childlike faith and childlike love and childlike vulnerability (see this post for that lesson). Now I am also understanding that the childlikeness to which we are called is also about how we connect to each other, i.e., how “community” happens among us.

I have become certain that being the New Testament church requires that we learn to connect with people without regard to all of the exterior characteristics the world teaches us to consider. Moreover, I believe there is even some level of connection which we must learn without regard to what a person believes. In short, I believe that part of the childlikeness to which we are called is a childlike willingness to play alongside others who look different, who think differently, and who believe things very different from what we believe. I believe Jesus was signaling this with His words in Matthew 18.

There are two adult generations today who are already shaped by a desire for this kind of connection. It just so happens that my own children are a part of those generations. They taught me when they were children, and they are teaching me as adults as well…about what childlikeness means.

© Blake Coffee
Permissions: You are permitted and encouraged to reproduce and distribute this material in any format provided that you do not alter the wording in any way and do not charge a fee beyond the cost of reproduction. For web posting, a link to this document on this website is preferred. Any exceptions to the above must be approved by Blake Coffee. Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: © Blake Coffee. Website: churchwhisperer.com

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Categories : Church Unity, Genuine Community, Matthew 18, missional

When the Painful Part is Only the Beginning

20 10 2011

Now, regarding the one who started all this—the person in question who caused all this pain—I want you to know that I am not the one injured in this as much as, with a few exceptions, all of you. So I don’t want to come down too hard. What the majority of you agreed to as punishment is punishment enough. Now is the time to forgive this man and help him back on his feet. If all you do is pour on the guilt, you could very well drown him in it. My counsel now is to pour on the love.  The focus of my letter wasn’t on punishing the offender but on getting you to take responsibility for the health of the church.  2 Corinthians 2:5-9 (The Message)

Years ago, I was in a race with several hundred other people.  It started on a beach in Corpus Christi, Texas.  After a half-mile swim in a very choppy ocean, we all ran to a transition area where we quickly put on cycling shoes and rode off on a 25-mile bike ride, about half of which was directly into a stiff and steady 20-mph headwind.  I considered myself a reasonably strong cyclist, so I was surprised that so many racers passed me on that windy ride.  By the time I got off the bike, my legs were jelly and my body was exhausted.  I sat down in the transition area, thinking about the 10K run still ahead of me.  I was genuinely torn about what I would do…I could quit now and just lie back and relax (that’s exactly what a large part of me was wanting) or I could strap my running shoes on and stand up and “will” my legs to work again.  What I did next would reveal my real intentions…my heart.

Matters of Christian accountability, especially those related to church discipline, are never as simple as finding fault and imposing consequences.  Those painful parts are only the beginning of discipline…they are just stages in a much longer process, one designed to ultimately turn the heart of one of God’s children.  Think about when you disciplined your own children.  It never ended with just a punishment.  There was always the continuing conversation to make sure the reason for the consequences was clear and that a lesson was learned.  There was always the hug and the “we still love you” message.  There is always a transition from the painful part to the loving part…a critical continuation of the process.

That was Paul’s point to the church in Corinth when, in 2 Corinthians 2, he encouraged them to continue working with the man they had disciplined, even after the “punishment” had taken place.  The whole point of church discipline is to “win the brother back”, so the process never ends with just removing fellowship from him.  Like my triathlon, there is still more race to run and there is a necessary transition into that next phase.  I have walked prayerfully through this discipline process with a few churches.  I always caution them along the way to check their hearts and to make sure their motives are right.  Are they doing this out of love and concern for this brother, or are they just trying to get rid of him so they no longer have to deal with him?  The easiest and clearest evidence of their real motive comes after the discipline is imposed…what they do next will reveal their true intentions.

Churches who “discipline” a member and have little or no follow-up contact with him are not really practicing discipline at all.  Churches who are truly heartbroken over the whole process and who have the “sinner’s” interests at heart will certainly stay in contact with him and work to turn him around.  The race is not yet over.  In fact, it is just beginning.  Now it is time to transition to the next stage…now it is time to forgive and to love and to reconcile.

Oh, back to my race… I did finish my triathlon.  I did not set any records.  But I finished, because it was what I had set my heart on doing from the beginning.  I finished what I started.  That time, anyway.  :)

© Blake Coffee
Permissions: You are permitted and encouraged to reproduce and distribute this material in any format provided that you do not alter the wording in any way and do not charge a fee beyond the cost of reproduction. For web posting, a link to this document on this website is preferred. Any exceptions to the above must be approved by Blake Coffee.  Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: © Blake Coffee. Website: churchwhisperer.com

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Categories : Christian Accountability, Church Unity, Corinthians, Forgiveness, Genuine Community, Matthew 18

The Rule of Persistence

15 09 2011

 Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up.  He said: “In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared what people thought.  And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, ‘Grant me justice against my adversary.’   “For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, ‘Even though I don’t fear God or care what people think,  yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won’t eventually come and attack me!’”  Luke 18:1-5

 But the people refused to listen to Samuel. “No!” they said. “We want a king over us. Then we will be like all the other nations, with a king to lead us and to go out before us and fight our battles.”   When Samuel heard all that the people said, he repeated it before the LORD.  The LORD answered, “Listen to them and give them a king.”  1 Samuel 8:19-22

 So when you are assembled and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present,  hand this man over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved on the day of the Lord. 1 Corinthians 5:4-5

Persistence, it seems, is a big deal to God.  We see it throughout the Bible, over and over again…so much so, in fact, that you could call it a rule: the Rule of Persistence.  Simply put, the spiritual rule of persistence is this: God’s nature is to reward persistence.  Mind you, that does not mean that persistence always wins out…it just means that, if scripture paints an accurate picture of God, then He is a God who is inclined to reward persistence.

Jesus’ parable of the persistent widow (Luke 18) is a positive example of it.  Jesus concludes that parable with these words: “And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off?  I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly.”  The Rule works in our favor in many circumstances.  The people of Israel crying out for a king in 1 Samuel 8 is another, slightly less positive example of the rule of persistence.  As they persisted in their desire for a king, even in the face of Samuel’s counsel against it, God finally said, “Fine.  Have it your way.”  You see, it is God’s nature to reward persistence, and it does not always work in our favor.

By far the most horrifying application of the Rule of Persistence is how it applies to the sin in our lives.  Read Matthew 18 (and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector) or 1 Corinthians 5 (hand this man over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh) or Titus 3 (warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time…after that, have nothing to do with them).  The common truth underlying all of those passages is this: when by our actions we PERSIST in refusing to be held accountable, PERSIST in refusing to live in obedience to God, and PERSIST in fighting against the ways and means of God’s law, God is inclined to oblige us and to give us what we are PERSISTENTLY asking for.  Like the father to the prodigal son, He gives us what we want and sends us on our way…alone and without the spiritual protection of God’s people.

C.S. Lewis said it this way: There are two kinds of people: those who say to God, “Thy will be done”, and those to whom God says, “All right then, have it your way.”  It is God’s wrath at its most painful point, when, in response to our persistence, He says to us, “have it your way.”

So as we persist in the messages we send to God, we must be careful…because God’s nature is to reward persistence.

What about the Rule of Persistence?  How will it operate in your life today?  How will it operate in the life of your church today?

© Blake Coffee
Permissions: You are permitted and encouraged to reproduce and distribute this material in any format provided that you do not alter the wording in any way and do not charge a fee beyond the cost of reproduction. For web posting, a link to this document on this website is preferred. Any exceptions to the above must be approved by Blake Coffee.  Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: © Blake Coffee. Website: churchwhisperer.com

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Categories : Christian Accountability, Corinthians, Matthew 18

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